While some of the families in our early intervention program choose to participate in the program in order to be proactive about substance abuse prevention, the majority of them are referred by their child’s school due to incidents related to drugs and/or alcohol. Therefore, many parents and teens alike do not want to be there, and some make that fact very clear when they first arrive. Their feelings are understandable.
However, we pride ourselves on making the experience as positive as possible for everyone. Right off the bat, I set expectations by explaining that whether families want to be there or not, if they are willing to give it a chance, very good things regularly can and do come from the program. I let them know that if they are willing to be receptive, and open, they will be pleasantly surprised by the time we’re done. Our aim is not only to prevent addiction, but to get parents reconnected with their kids, to reduce family stress, to help teens feel more understood, and to help parents feel better prepared.
We typically do achieve those results. However, tonight it was even more pronounced when we finished the last session of our second January group. A mom (who made it clear she did not want to be in the program when referred by her child’s school) had told us previously that she would be bringing her daughter to week one and that the child’s dad would bring her to week two, as she (the mom) had no intention of coming to both sessions.
Lo and behold, she was not only there tonight (with her daughter’s father), she pulled me and my co-facilitator aside afterward and told us that she made a point to come back tonight because she was so impressed with what came out of week one. She then added, “As a result of last week, we had the best conversation with our daughter that we have ever had. I mean that. Ever.” Her daughter chimed in and said, “We really did.”
If nothing else were to come from my time in prevention, the opportunity to get parents reconnected with their kids is worth it. There is no more important relationship, and there is no greater way to keep a child healthy, safe, and thriving, than for that child to have an excellent relationship with their parent or parents.
“Lord, make me an instrument of your peace…”